We’ve all thought about it at one time or another: Should I have a conversation with my dad? There are many cases for and against, and in the end, it is a deeply personal decision that we each must make for ourselves.
Sometimes, we talk to him because we need something. Other times, we talk to him because we feel guilty that we haven’t talked to him in a while. Or maybe it’s a third thing.
So, are you ready to have a conversation with your dad?
Okay, you are definitely ready to have a conversation with your dad. But first, you have to find him.
Hmm. Nope, not here.
You are shocked not to find your dad in the kitchen, a place he can often be found.
No dads here on the patio.
You walk into your dad’s office building.
“Oh, you must be Dad’s kid,” says your dad’s boss, Mrs. Clakswaby. “He’s not here right now.”
There he is! Of course your dad is in the den.
Here he is! Your dad! Time to see if you can keep up a conversation with him. He’s even taking a break from his beloved iPad to talk to you.
What do you want to talk about?
Your dad blinks a few times. Looks like he’s getting a little steamed. Better hurry up and figure out what you want to say about the weather!
“Sure,” your dad says.
Whoa! Kind of a curveball there.
“Why, I think that’s a marvelous idea,” says Mrs. Clakswaby. “You can start right away! Have these flowers in congratulations.”
You may have never spoken with your dad, but you did land a plum job with a six-figure salary and health benefits, which is better!
“The American Civil War?” your dad grunts. “That is one of my favorite civil wars.”
Whoa! Looks like maybe you’ve found some common ground here, so what you say next is crucial.
“186,500,” your dad says immediately.
Hmmm. That didn’t seem to really spark a conversation.
“I think it’s best if you changed the subject,” your dad says.
“You want advice?” your dad says. “Or do you want to talk about the concept of advice?”
“Oh, okay,” your dad says. “Advice is a social contract in which a person, or group of people, offer their analysis and insights in an attempt to solve or mitigate a problem of a second party. The second party can ask for, or request, these insights, or the first person or group can offer them unsolicited. Both of these outcomes would be considered to fall in the category of ’advice.’ Shall I continue?”
“Very well,” your dad says. “The concept of advice is perhaps best illuminated by an example. Let me bring up a helpful illustration I’ve made on my iPad.
“In a common advice-seeking scenario, Person A approaches Person B and Person C, who are typically older and have more life experience than Person A. Person A lays out a conflict he or she is currently experiencing and then asks Persons B and C what they would do if they were presented with an identical conflict. Person B says that he would do one thing, while Person C says she would do a different thing. Both of these suggestions, while opposite in nature, are considered ’advice.’ The fact that one word describes both of them is an inherent foible of language. Shall I continue?”
“Very well. The concept of advice relies heavily on the theory of linear time, or that time passes sequentially. Linear time theory is what enables events to occur, and therefore what allows events to have occured. It is these events that have already taken place that allow older, wiser people to give advice, because they draw on these past experiences, guaranteed by the theory of linear time. Shall I continue?”
You notice that your head feels a little funny and that blood has begun to pool in your eyes.
“Want to talk about Matchstick Men (2003)?” you ask your dad.
“Never heard of it,” he says.
Uh-oh. That didn’t go so hot. What do you want to do now?
“It stars Sam Rockwell,” you say.
“Never heard of him,” your Dad says.
Yikes. You are really blowing this.
“It’s a movie,” you say to your dad.
“Never heard of it,” your dad says.
This is turning out to be a notably bad conversation with your dad.
“It’s a series of still images that are strung together in rapid succession to achieve the illusion of motion, typically for 90 minutes to two hours.”
“No idea what you’re talking about,” says your dad.
“It’s basically—” but your dad cuts you off.
“Look at these seeds in my hand,” he says.
You look up.
“You’re not my dad,” you say.
“No, I’m not,” the man says. “We switched places while you were looking at the seeds.”
Looks like you blew it!
“If you do find your dad, make sure to tell him that I understand, and that I’m sorry,” Mrs. Clakswaby says.
Where do you want to look now?
“Okay,” your dad says. “But just be warned that I hate giving and taking advice.”
“Wish I could say the same,” your dad says as he walks away. The den is empty.
You did a bad job keeping up a conversation with your dad!
“Okay,” your dad says, admiring his iPad. “What do you want to talk about now?”
“That’s an odd way to put that,” your dad says.
It looks like he could leave this conversation at any moment. Better step up your game!
“Oh,” your dad says. “Yes, that sounds good. Thank you.”
He takes a peanut from your hand and eats it happily.
“Yes,” your dad practically shouts. “Please give me another peanut.”
Your dad’s eyes light up with greed in a way you’ve never seen them look before. He grabs the peanuts from your hand and knocks your bag of peanuts to the floor. Finding his hunger uncontrollable, he drops to the floor to scoop up the peanuts, shells and all, into his selfish mouth. He makes animal noises and slobbers all over the rug in the den.
By offering him peanuts while asking for nothing in return, you taught your dad that boundaries do not exist, nor must they be respected. Now, you have no hope of holding a conversation with your dad.
“I’ve always thought that too,” your dad says. “You know, it’s really easy to talk to you.”
Whoa! Things are going great! Can you keep this up?
“Took the words from my mouth,” your dad says. “If you ever want to borrow my iPad, you feel free.”
Your dad loves tablet computing, so that’s a big deal! You’re quite the dad conversation hotshot! Can you bring it home?
“Okay,” your dad says. “Just don’t come crawling to me if you want the concept of advice explained again.”
“Maracas?” your dad says. “Now we’re talking!”
A lengthy and interesting conversation about maracas ensues.
Okay, so you technically kept up a conversation with your dad, but you used the tried-and-true shortcut of abruptly bringing up maracas, which is essentially akin to cheating.
Try again, and do it with dignity this time.
You lie down on your belly and begin to sneak toward your dad. Without turning around, he begins talking to you.
“You can’t sneak up on me,” he says. “In Vietnam, I was in charge of shooting at people.”
You throw a rock to create a diversion for some reason. Your dad, without turning around, sticks out his hand and snags the rock out of midair. He crushes it in his fist.
“Pipe down,” your dad says, standing up. “I’m right here.”
“It’s good,” your dad says. “More of the same.”
“Yeah,” your dad says. He coughs errantly. “What’s new with you?”
“Ah, good. Now you can stop using our HBO password. Haha.”
There is a short silence. Your dad scratches his nose a bit.
Your dad continues to not say anything.
“Yeah,” your dad says. “They didn’t look great, but a win is a win, I guess. You watch it?”
Oh, man. This is brutal.
“That’s a good point,” says your dad. “I didn’t think about it like that.”
“Dear God, why would you say that?” your dad says, recoiling in horror. “You know very well that they are dead and that they meant quite a lot to me. You are a horrible person.”
Your dad galumphs away.
Wow. Why would you do that to your own father? Looks like you blew it pretty bad.
“Very well. An issue with linear time is that it can only guarantee the present. Therefore, Person B can remember past events (which he or she can draw on to give advice), but the memories exist only in the present. The events themselves are not accessible, and cannot be 100 percent guaranteed to have existed; only the recalling of the event can be said to exist, merely because it is happening in the present. Shall I continue?”
You notice that your headache has intensified and that blood is still pooling in your eyes, clouding your vision. These are classic aneurysm symptoms, just FYI.
“Very well. This phenomena can potentially lead to a false memory, or a memory that the advice-giver thinks is genuine but is actually untrue. This means that the advice may actually be bad, even if the intention is good. In this scenario, Person A will have to choose whether to accept or deny advice given to him or her by Persons B and C that is potentially based on flawed conclusions arrived at through inaccurate recollections. Shall I continue?”
There is now an intense yet somehow distant throbbing in your head. Your vision is nearly clouded entirely with the significant amount of blood that has rushed into your corneas.
ave you heard, ladiesssssss? “Boobs are back in a big way” according to one seriously bored New York Post writer. You know how you’ve been hiding those bad girls away for who knows how long? Shuddering them from the world because they just weren’t in style? Well finally, those floppy nuisances can be put to good use as part of your wardrobe!
Needless to say, women everywhere were quick to call out this article and its strange sort of sexist nature. The responses are so funny that they deserve an emoji of an Italian chef kissing her fingers, but they haven’t made that emoji yet.
Where did boobs go? Doesn’t matter. One thing’s for sure: They’re back now!
“Stand up straight, push out your chest and work that feminine charm, as bountiful boobs are back in style,” begins this nonsensical, fabricated nightmare article.
“For the last year, those of us blessed with a chest have been slaves to the trend for curbing our curves.”
OH, HAVE WE? What did you do about the size of your breasts in the last yearto keep up with the times? Did you layer on the sports bras? Hide ’em under your armpits? Tell them to take a gap year and backpack through Europe? If you like and want your boobs, then no, you didn’t. Because boobs are a body part, not an accessory.
It’s amazing that we remembered boobs at all considering how long they were apparently missing.
We couldn’t even post “MISSING BOOBS” flyers because, you know, censorship.
But fashion is cyclical, so smart women didn’t get rid of their boobs.
They just let them sit on the shelf.
But what option did women have, really, while boobs weren’t en vogue?
If you think about it, it’s actually quite a hassle to get rid of your boobs.
Especially when you consider the mess that is the American health care system.
This woman has the right idea.
Now that they’re back in style, vintage boobs are the way to go.
If they don’t brush your kneecaps when you walk, yourknockers are not trendy enough.
So go on, dig your boobs out from under those Christmas sweaters.
They may smell like mothballs, but just give ’em a good scrubbing and they’ll be ready to go.
ports car drivers aren’t exactly the most beloved people on Earth, so you might not have toomuch sympathy for the man responsible for what you’re about to see.
I mean, the stereotype is that they’re rich guys overcompensating for something by purchasing an expensive car that they often drive recklessly to get attention.
I’m not saying Ibuy it, but that’s the image they have.
Let’s just say that this story doesn’t exactly contradictthat image…
A man got a little too aggressive too quickly with his new toy, reducing a brand new Ferrari to a literal pile of ashes.
The photos are terrifying but know that the driver/owner is ok.
There are two ways to look at this ugly incident.
This Twitter user chose to believe that the driver was lucky to escape with his life.
It’s hard to argue with that, right?
But even adhering to the “at least you have your health” mindset, you can’t help but let your mind wonder.
And say to yourself, “What a waste,” just like this Twitter user did.
I mean, it would be one thing if this happened after years of ownership.
But this happened almost instantlyafter the purchaser took it off the lot. Like, sixty minutes or so.
Now look at it.
I mean, I would pray that you set up insurance on something like this before you take possession.
Either way, that group won’t be happy with this news.
That car is T-O-T-A-L-E-D.
oly smokes! What a month July was! Fireworks, hotdogs, and health care debates! Also, there were sooooo many movies and TV shows to watch. Thankfully, I had very little to do and got through almost everything!
But the turning of the calendar means a whole NEW challenge has emerged! Our entertainment supplier Netflix has released their list of hot, hot, hot new titles to keep you entertained in the warm August heat. So don’t go outdoors! Stay inside and watch these incredible titles.
Roll that beautiful bean footage!
Available August 1
Crematorium: Season 1
Funny Games (US)
Lord of War
Maz Jobrani: Immigrant NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Surviving Escobar Alias JJ: Season 1 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
The Addams Family
The Astronauts Wife
The Hollywood Masters: Season 1
The Last Mimzy
The Matrix Reloaded
The Matrix Revolutions
The Number 23
The Royal House of Windsor: Season 1
The Truth About Alcohol
The Wedding Party
Tie The Knot
Who Gets the Dog?
Wild Wild West
Available August 2
Jab We Met
Available August 3
The Invisible Guardian
Available August 4
Icarus NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Voltron: Legendary Defender: Season 3 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Wet Hot American Summer: Ten Years Later: Season 1 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Available August 5
Available August 8
My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic: Season 7 Episodes 1-13
Available August 9
Black Site Delta
Available August 10
Diary of an Exorcist Zero
Available August 11
Atypical: Season 1 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Home: Adventures with Tip & Oh: Season 3 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Naked NETFLIX ORIGINAL FILM
True and The Rainbow Kingdom: Season 1 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
White Gold NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Available August 13
Arthur and the Invisibles
Mission Control: The Unsung Heroes of Apollo
Available August 14
Available August 15
Brad Paisleys Comedy Rodeo NETFLIX ORIGINAL
A New Economy
All These Sleepless Nights
Murderous Affair: Season 1
The Sweet Life
Available August 16
Available August 18
Dinotrux: Season 5 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Glitter Force Doki Doki: Season 1 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
I Am Sam
Marvels The Defenders: Season 1 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
What Happened to Monday NETFLIX ORIGINAL FILM
Available August 19
Hide and Seek
Available August 20
Available August 21
Gomorrah: Season 2
Available August 22
Lynne Koplitz: Hormonal Beast NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Sadies Last Days on Earth
Available August 23
Available August 25
Disjointed: Part 1 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Death Note NETFLIX ORIGINAL FILM
DreamWorks Dragons: Race to the Edge: Season 5 NETFLIX ORIGINAL
Once Upon a Time: Season 6
Available August 29
Bring It On: Worldwide #Cheersmack
Ryan Hamilton: Happy Face NETFLIX ORIGINAL
The Good Place: Season 1
Available August 31
Adam’s choice of the month: SING!
I personally haven’t seen it, but my niece makes me play the soundtrack every time I drive her anywhere, so I would have to give my prestigious PICK OF THE MONTH to the animated porker.
ummer is here, which means more people are outside trying to enjoy nature, albeit nature that’s filled with bugs. They’re a part of the deal, and most of the time they’re simply annoying. But other times they can pose serious threats that could impact your life forever.
Take, for instance, the tick.
Theyre so small that people often dont notice them on their bodies until its too late, at which point their bites can lead to a varietyof medical problems.
Most people know that they’re mostcommonly associated with Lyme disease, which can be debilitating. But its important to remember that they pose other threats, too.
Even if they dont kill you, the effects fromtheir bite can last a lifetime especially from one specific kind of tick that’s spreading to new locations.
That would be the Lone Star tick, also known as the Northeastern water tick, and identified by the unique spot on its back.
According to the Center for Disease Control, Lone Star ticks at all stages of life bite humans even the tick’s larvae, unlike those of all other American ticks and can be “quite aggressive.”
But what makes them so dangerous is that they carry a special kind of sugar in theirbodies called alpha-gal.Thanks to evolution, humans no longer produce this sugar, but its found in all red meat, pork, and some dairy products.
That’s where we run into a problem.
When a Lone Star tick bites a human, it injects this special alpha-gal sugar into the victims body. The human immune system naturally responds to the bite by creating antibodies to fight the foreign substance.
From that moment on, whenever that person eats any meat that contains the alpha-gal sugar, a severe allergic reaction occurs.
“The weird thing about [this reaction] is it can occur within three to 10 or 12 hours, so patients have no idea what prompted their allergic reactions,” said Dr. Ronald Saff, an allergist in Tallahassee, Florida, and an assistant clinical professor at the Florida State University College of Medicine.
The symptoms are often severe hives and shortness of breath are common, and a dangerous anaphylactic reaction is possible. But they seem to appear out of the blue, often the night after eating a burger or steak.
As a result, the Lone Star ticks victims are essentially forced into a life of semi-vegetarianism, although most can still safely eat fish and poultry.
Some people develop more sensitivity than others, and a few can tolerate small amounts of meat, but some become so allergic that they can’t even consume animal products like dairy milk.
The Lone Star tick is most common in the Southeast, but have spread up the East Coast and into the Midwest, with large numbers being reported all the way up in Maine.
Within the last year, outbreaks of alpha-gal allergy have occurred in Minnesota, New Hampshire, and on the tip of Long Island.
“We expect with warming temperatures, the tick is going to slowly make its way northward and westward and cause more problems than they’re already causing,” Saff said.
It’s nothing to become paranoid about, but make sure to be vigilant when spending any time outdoors, and always check your skin, clothes, and pets when you come in from outside.
Better safe than sorry.
s someone diagnosed with depression, OCD, and anxiety, most days I feel like there’s really no upside to dealing with these issues.Although each sufferer has a different experience and different levels of struggle, they can probably all agree that it’s no walk in the park.
It’s more than just a blanket diagnosis there are different kinds of anxiety but it turns out there are some pretty superb qualities about anxious peoplethat could be related to their disorder.
People who live with anxiety have a heightened sense of worry.
Although this is often regarded as a bad thing, there are actually some cases where this can come in useful.
There have been a few small studies done that suggest that anxiety may have evolved within people the same way intelligence has.
Studies have also shown that people who have been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder are often associated with high IQs.
Just ask Dr. Jeremy Coplan, a study researcher of psychiatry at State University of New York Downstate Medical Center.
He explained that although most people tend to view anxiety as a negative thing, it is actually linked to intelligence.
But what does that mean?
According to Livescience, Copland explained that although anxiety can at times be disabling and the patients worries irrational, there are some situations where there actually is a dangerous situation, and that excessive worry becomes useful and adaptive.
In fact, people who immediately act on those “wild-card dangers” are more likely to survive and preserve the lives of their loved ones.
A test involved twenty-six people who live with anxiety disorders and eighteen people who do not.
They took an IQ quiz, as well as a test to asses their worry. The study found that those with higher levels of worry during the test had the higher IQ as a result.
But it’s not just intelligence that they studied.
Some people believe that those who suffer from anxiety have a better likelihood of being empathetic, as they may be better at reading emotional signs as well as being attuned to certain energies.
I can personally speak to this, as I feel like dealing with my own struggles makes me much more sensitive to the struggles that others might share.
But it’s important to remember that there are actually different types of anxiety disorders, and not everyone living with anxiety will be affected the same way.
t’s not news to anyone that cats are strange creatures. The slinky felines have taken over our homes and our Internet memes. They spit up hairballs, poop in boxes, and sleep 16 hours a day. And somehow, these traits make them desirable pets.
Their everyday habits are bizarre enough, but there are some lesser known facts aboutcats that are sure to make you go, “Whaaaaa?” and give your kitty some serious side-eye. Ready to be surprised? Snuggle up with your cat and start scrolling.
Cats sweat through their paws.
Cats are, as you know, covered in fur (except for this guy!), so they don’t really have sweat glands. So when cats become overheated or frightened, they sweat through their paws. They can cool themselves off by panting (though that’s usually more stress-related) or licking their fur. If you see a bunch of little watery paw prints on the ground, follow them to the sweaty kitty!
Cats and umbrellas have a lot in common.
We’ve all heard that cats always land on their feet, right? And we’ve all thrown a cat out of a window to test this theory, right? Right?* Well, to a certain extent, it’s true. Cats have a righting reflex. When a cat begins falling, he will rotate his head until he’s facing right side up, then he’ll arch his back, position his legs under him and fall softly, spread out like an umbrella.
In fact, it has been found that cats that fall from greater heights (even more than five stories) generally suffer fewer injuries than those that fall from just a few floors up because they have a longer time to right themselves.***
*Don’t actually throw a cat out a window. Even if it lands on its feet, it will never forgive you.**
**No, I do not know this from personal experience.
***Again, do not test this theory.
A group of cats is called a “clowder.”
Yep, a group of cats is called a “clowder.” And a group of cats from Maine that has an affinity for seafood is called a New England Clam Clowder.
(Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week.)
Purring can heal their bones.
This may be the craziest fact of all, but it’s true. Yes, cats purr when they’re happy, when they’re relaxed, or even sometimes when they’re stressed.
But, and here’s where it gets insane, domestic cats purr at a frequency between 25 and 150 Hertz, which according to Live Science, “happens to be the frequency at which muscles and bones best grow and repair themselves.” That’s right many believe that cats naturally evolved their purr over time as a healing and survival tactic. Biology iswild.
Cats can drink straight from the ocean.
If you get stranded on a desert island, you shouldnot drink seawater. You will die. The good news is, if you get stranded on a desert island with a cat, you will still die, but that cat can lap up as much seawater as its little heart desires. Cats’ kidneys are much more efficient than ours and can filter out all that salt. Little buggers.
picture is worth a thousand words. Some of those pictures’ words are really spooky.
These thirteen photos may be chilling to look at, but they become endlessly more terrifying once you know the spine-tingling stories behind them.
Regina Kay Walters
The fear in the eyes of this girl is real. This picture was taken by Robert Ben Rhoades, a serial killer. Fourteen-year-old Regina Kay Walters, pictured here in the last known photograph taken of her, was one of several women Rhoades kidnapped and kept in an 18-wheeler with a torture chamber in the back. He cut off her hair and made her wear a black dress and heels beforehe killed her.
The Russian Famine
In 1921-1922, a devastatingfamine befell the people of Russia.Years of warfare combined with natural causes left millions of people without food.Before the Great Famine ended, at least five million Russians died of starvation and disease.
Rumors of murder, cannibalism, and an underground human flesh trade became rampant during this time. The extent of cannibalism during this time is unknown, but historians have verified some accounts. Pictured here are suspected cannibals and the body parts that were found in their home.
Maria Elena Milagro de Hoyos
Carl Tanzler was a German-born doctor at the United States Marine Hospital in Key West, Florida in the early 20th century. He’s most well-known for the obsession he developed for a Cuban-American tuberculosis patient, Elena “Helen” Milagro de Hoyos. Tanzler, who considered de Hoyos a great beauty, tried to treather disease to no avail. She died at her parents’ home in 1931.
Tanzler paid for her funeral and visited her mausoleum almost every night. But that wasn’t enough. One night in April 1933, Tanzler snuck through the cemetery and removed de Hoyos’ body from her mausoleum. He brought her home, kept her bones together with wire hangers, replaced her rotting flesh with waxed silk cloth and made a wig out of her hair. He stuffed her with rags to make sure she kept her form, and he dressed her in nice outfits.
He also kept her body in his bed…
…for seven years.
He would have kept her longer, but he was found out by de Hoyos’ sister.
This may look like a goofy photo of two kids who encountered too much static, but the truth is much more sinister. The two McQuilken brothers, Michael (right, 18) and Sean, 12, had no idea that they were about to be struck by lightning when this photo was taken in 1975.
They were climbing Moro Rock in California’s Sequoia National Park and thought it was funny when their hair stood on end. Moments later, a bolt of lightning hit almost exactly where they stood. Sean was one of three peopledirectly hit he suffered third-degree burns to his back and elbows, but he was much luckier than another hiker, who died from the electric shock.
Yes, this is a high school class photo of a bunch of ’90s kids. But if you look closely, in the top left corner, you’ll see Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold wearing sunglasses and pointing their fingers like guns at the camera.
This is the Columbine High School class of ’99. Months after this photo was taken, Harris and Klebold would commit one of the most heinous and highly publicized school shootings in United States history.